Daddies

Tonight as I was putting the babies to bed Shailee and I told a "Big White Story" we started telling these stories a while ago. The stories always involve some big, white object such as a big white bed or a big white plate. They also always involve us being together as a family Cole, me, Shailee and Hyrum. We usually go on a little adventure, have a picnic, do our favorite things like reading or painting together, Shailee adds the details like what we are wearing and what we eat. I think these stories are about security, we both add the details that make us feel safe or at peace. For me it's being together I think that's also a big part of it for Shailee. I don't think we've told one since February. It did bring me a sense of security and Shailee fell asleep peacefully as I finished the story. Moments like that make me feel that all the world is right.

Hyrum struck up a conversation about Daddies and how he is going to be a Daddy and he is getting big. He told me he was going to get married in the temple. We called Cole to tell him per Hyrum's request. Cole asked "Who are you going to marry?" Hyrum said "Lucy" Then Hyrum asked,"Can I have lots of babies?" So heads up for Hyrum's future wife whoever she may be.

cousins

Shailee and Hyrum's cousins were over tonight. They had fun reading from the Book of Mormon story book.
My Mom reading to the babies

These two have a love-hate relationship. That's pretty normal for this age. But they really had fun tonight. Hyrum and his cousin Collin are a month apart in age.

Babies having fun

Sidewalk chalk. Yeah!

Playing with Aunty Hallies umbrellas

Shailee the princess

Hyrum put on my grandmas glasses and he looked so much like Cole

At the Museum

Me and my sister and nephew

Hyrum with his cousins in the bubbles

It's Spring break for Shailee's cousins so we all played at the children's museum today. Here they are around a sand and water table with my older brother David.

Late night thoughts

I have been sitting here tonight feeling inspired by NieNie and her joy in life. I think that I have always pictured my life a certain way. I have a list in my journal of goals and ideals I want to attain. But I have lately felt myself turned around, looking at a whole new perspective I didn't anticipate. At first I found myself quite reluctant to accept it, it is not easy to change ones goals and ideals. But life is precious, no matter what angle we are looking at it from. Life is too precious to sit in mourning for long. It can change so quickly...and the pain or discomforts can force us into just the right perspective to really see the beauty in it all.
I was thinking today about my strong little girl. Oh how she can glue herself to a position. She came to this earth all ready to fight for her agency. I know that what I need to teach her I've got to teach now. I have met a lot of strong little girls lately. I suppose that when Father in Heaven was choosing spirits to come down in our days He knew that those little girls would have to be mothers who could withstand the hurricanes of uncertainty that will come upon them. Those little girls will have to be tough as nails and unbendable in the cause of truth. I feel worn out sometimes trying to offer her what I feel she needs, because it is not easily accepted. But I feel grateful that when she knows something is right she will stand like a rock.
I have been thinking of the pieces of my heart back in WV, the biggest piece being with Cole. Other pieces scattered among the beautiful women who have changed me forever with their friendship Katie, Kristen, Mary, Jenny and many others. Still other pieces in the memories of places where my babies and I have played and grown.
I have been thinking of the blessing of families. That unseperable bond which allows us to hurt and be hurt without being cut off, and to love and be loved so that we grow to understand who we are. My eternal companion seems almost unreal so far away, and all those weeks in between us feel like forever. But all the growing we have done together is all the more precious because of the distance.

Do your Happy Dance

Hyrum has been making me laugh all day. As we were driving to the store with my mom he was playing with a storm trooper figurine. "This is a babysitter" He said.

We got some chocolate pudding at the store and as he ate it he did his happy dance. He does this when his food tastes good to him which is almost always.

Later he was eating some bunny shaped pasta, " I love these guys soo much!" He said and stabbed them viciously with his fork. Yikes.

Then when we got home from a walk this evening and it was getting dark, Shailee noticed that the sprinklers were on. I could not convince her that it was not a good time to run in them so she and Hyrum stripped down to their under things and off they went. After that Hyrum removed his undershirt and was flexing and jumping around. I guess there is no freedom like underwear and nothing else.

Babies are awesome.

Happy Belated St. Patricks Day

Family in ABQ

I used to play with this marble game at my grandmas house when I was Shailee's age. My grandparents brought it over tonight for Shailee and Hyrum to play with.

My grandparents with the babies

My younger brother was playing the guitar tonight and the kids ran in to listen to him. He was very patient. Hyrum found it hard not to touch the guitar.

From Elder Diedter F. Uchtdorf

Hope is not knowledge,but rather the abiding trust that the Lord will fulfill His promise to us. It is confidence that if we live according to God’s laws and the words of His prophets now, we will receive desired blessings in the future. It is believing and expecting that our prayers will be answered. It is manifest in confidence, optimism, enthusiasm, and patient perseverance.

here comes the sun

Shailee with my sister's son Mathew James

Hyrum with our friend Isabella. Her mother Michelle has been my advocate as I jump through all the medical hoops here.

We took the babies to a park by my parents house today. SUNSHINE! I was made to live in the sunshine. We had fun basking in it just as these giant lizard sculptures do. They are a little scary huh, Hyrum thought so. It took some pursuasion to get him up there.

I took another little trip to the hospital last friday. They gave me fluids and did a lot of tests and that was about it. I started feeling better after a blessing from my dad on Sunday and now I'm back home with some follow up appointments this next week. Still mysterious, but I feel a lot of peace now and I'll take the energy I get and enjoy it. I'm still feeling the love of friends and family...phone calls from WV, visits from family here. Thanks too all who took care of my babies and me and thanks to all who are looking out for Cole.

Fairwell

Well our friends in West Virginia sent us off with plenty of love. They threw a "Prince and Princess" party for Shailee and Hyrum at the Davis's home. There was a treasure hunt, a cake- walk and crown decorating. We had so much fun! West Virginia makes people kindhearted. Shailee's preschool teachers sent us of with a bag of travel supplies,prayers,and love. We also spent our last family night with the Atkinsons and reenacted stories from the New Testament and they gave us some wonderful souvenir books of the mountain state. On our last day friends and nieghbors stopped by with very thoughtful gifts and hugs and more love...